It is so magical the ease with which inner knowing and guidance come in to us now. All we have to do is ask the question or make the request for information and it shows up quickly, between immediately to 48 hours.
I've been asking for knowing about what is getting in my way.
I see now that my answers have been coming in in layers. Peeling back the onion, as we say. This awareness reminded me of Stanley Kunitz' beautiful and powerful poem, The Layers. On rereading it, I find his poem to be a perfect expression of where I am today. What he expresses about the journey through life is so universal. And it was his inner knowing that directed him forward to "Live in the layers, not on the litter." In this post, I could have simply written: "This is where I am today" and posted Stanely Kunitz' poem. But that would be a cop out and this post is about making the decision not to cop out nor live on the litter anymore.
Back to the point, I've been asking for knowing about what is getting in my way. And every few days I receive another insight about a limiting belief I was not consciously aware of, a fear to release, a prod to take action in some way.
I used to be a night owl, however, the early morning epiphanies I'm now experiencing have made me love the mornings and the moments when I'm first just waking up. This morning brought a very big Ah Ha. Sitting with my cup of coffee, my awareness shifted and I suddenly saw with clarity the pattern that is not serving me at all in my desire to move forward creating the life that I love. My answer to what is getting in my way is pure and simple, myself and a fear.
We've been getting the messages recently about now is the time for us to have the courage to be and express ourselves as who we truly are. Well I've always been a free spirit, regardless of the disapproval I've encountered from some along the way. So I brushed off the guidance as an issue I didn't really need to focus on. This morning I realized that is not the case at all. In fact the fear of expressing who I really am is right at the heart of the matter.
The pattern I now recognize in myself is one of holding back from expressing who I am. Like in creating my new business. Rather than just move forward with all the steps necessary to launch this business, I've been creating excuses, obstacles, stalling, and generally employing anything I can to avoid putting the real me out in the world. I can't do this because that hasn't happened yet. I need to take care of that before I can finish up the copy for my website, I'm feeling to out of alignment to do much today.........Yada yada, yada.
What most often holds us back from openly expressing who we are is the fear of what we might experience, and in particular what we might feel. Being a Lightworker, we've had a hard road to this point full of rejection, judgement, feeling all alone, feeling that we don't fit in, feeling disappointment. Years ago doing personal growth work with a therapist, she identified that disappointment wove a continuous thread through my life. Yet I somehow found the strength and courage to keep imagining what I could create and going forward. Looking back from today, I see the thread of disappointment continued on, weaving through so many of my endeavors. To the point that the fear of feeling more disappointment is my biggest obstacle.
Now I could spend some more days roaming around in my head looking at how this disappointment or that one influenced me, but that would just be continuing to live the pattern I choose now to release. Instead, I can choose to cast the fear aside, center into resonance with my immense strength and courage and go for it. And that is exactly what I'm choosing to do. I am fed up and done with feeling stuck, which frankly, feels just as bad as the disappointment I've been seeking to avoid.
I have always known in every cell in my body that I have the power to create what I want. That knowing has never left me. Much of the disappointment, and deep frustration, I've felt for so many years is about how hard it's been to manifest what I want in the 3D world. Like swimming upstream in cold molasses. Yet we're in 5D now. Everything is different. The knowing and guidance we request comes to us with ever increasing speed. The massage comes through in every direction: "Now is our time for living in joy!" And I love and respect myself too much to let some imagined fear of perhaps feeling disappointment get in my way from experiencing the joy of being and expressing who I truly am. When we hold ourselves back because of the fear of the bad things we might experience, we then miss out on all the good things we can experience.
Peeling back, releasing and clearing. It's all part of the process of experiencing ascension in the physical. We spiral upwards. We peel back the layers and with each layer our awareness expands, our understanding deepens, and we clear away a bit more of the fog we experience as the veil. This is our process of blooming. Of opening up with courage and strength to reveal the lotus flower that we each are.
Now, I have some work to do. Tomorrow I'll finish up and post the blog post about vibrations that I started yesterday. With much love, Helen
We are in uncharted waters in our journey of expanding the consciousness of humanity on the planet. By sharing our new and widening perspectives, our experiences, feelings and observations, and our epiphanies (!), we are co-creating New Earth.
Each morning now I close my eyes and focus on the stillness in my heart. I feel/see/sense a ball of brilliant white light fill my heart, then radiate outward, filling my whole body, my aura, and beyond. I open wide my chakras and shoot the white light down into the center of the earth and upward into all that is. And I call in a direct connection with my Divine Self, the source of my most expanded inner knowing. I ask that my Divine Self maintain this connection throughout the day, guiding me, filling me with knowing. That each day this connection strengthen. Until I am in continual connection with my inner knowing. I can hardly wait for this to happen.
I'm fast discovering that as I deepen my connection with my Divine Self, the knowing and answers to my questions and requests for information come quickly. That is what happened when I asked for guidance as to what was getting in my way in starting my new business. It only took a few minutes for the answers to come into my awareness. How wonderful is that? That we can now easily open up our awareness and receive the support and knowing we request whenever we want it, it's all so magical.
I shared in the last post that I was going to dive in and sort out the feelings, perceptions, and limiting beliefs that were tripping me up in my efforts to create my new business. I had trepidations because in the past such an endeavor required re-experiencing a bunch of painful events from my past. But that's not at all how the process unfolded.
I remember reading somewhere a few years ago that we no longer have to rehash old stuff to release it. At the time, I discounted this guidance because I'd known how important it was to really examine deeply every facet of a painful or difficult experience in order to reach a new level of understanding and extract the wisdom and benefit I received from the painful experience. However, what I'm discovering now is that it is much easier to unearth, release and clear old stuff than it used to be. We still need to identify where we picked up the old, unserving beliefs. Yet our process no longer requires that we re-experiencing all the old unpleasant emotions from our past experiences. Some very nice benefits of moving in our new uncharted waters.
This is the process I went through in the past couple of days to identify and clear the limiting belief that was getting in my way. It was an intuitive mix of tools I've collected in the past year or so.
First I made a list of the work experiences that I'd found disappointing, hurtful, and that filled me with despair and resentment. In doing this I was writing out briefly, my stories: When I worked here, they didn't pay me very much even though I was doing the bulk of the work for the organization. Others got raises and accolades, but I did not. When I worked there, I carried a much greater work load than most of my co-workers, I worked in a constant state of stress to keep up with this unmanageable work load, but I was paid less and received smaller annual salary increases than others, .... etc. Reviewing the list, it was easy to see the pattern. And Bingo! there was the limiting belief I'd developed from these experiences: No matter how hard I work, I never get the benefits I should receive in exchange. Instead I get disappointment, hurt, resentment, and the continual message that I'm not good enough.
With an underlying, and unconscious belief that my best work would be pointless, and eventually harmful to me, it's easy to see why I'd dig my heals in and avoid anything that resembled development of a new career.
Next I rewrote my story. This pattern in my career actually had it's roots in my early childhood growing up in a large family where there was no affection and very little attention or acknowledgement of who I was. Yet I am not the person I was back then. I'm not even the person I was a year ago or a month ago. I was just a child, with very limited awareness and skills, certainly not the level of awareness and skills I have now. When I moved into adulthood, the limiting belief was already fully embedded and operating. I created my career experiences in conformance with my limiting belief, all of it unconsciously. Standing up for myself in a matter of fact manner was not in my vocabulary at all during my earlier career. When I did ask for what I felt I deserved, it was done full of resentment and anger, and thus wasn't well received.
An image that came to me in this process was of an egg and a young eagle. I was an egg back then and now I'm a young eagle soaring in the sky. Eggs have potential but they don't have a lot of awareness. As an eagle, I move with ease and flow with a higher perspective and more expansive vision. I can lift myself above obstacles in my way.
When we release an old, unserving, limiting belief, we get to choose the new empowering belief we want to replace it. How fun is that?
At one point in this process, I recognized that I do hold a very strong belief that I am a very strong creator and I can create what I want in my life. Yet this empowering belief definitely couldn't operate fully along side the limiting belief that no matter how hard I worked, I'd never receive the benefits of my work. I decided that I'd simply release the limiting belief and allow the belief that I am a powerful creator who can create what I want in my life to have the space and prominence it deserves.
And as for the emotional residue held within my field, all that pain, despair, disappointment, and discouragement I'd experienced, it needs to be released as well. It's definitely not something I want hanging around causing mischief. And much gratitude that I do not have to re-experience it all again. What I've done so far is to ask my DNA to release the negative emotional residue. Our DNA has such expansive knowledge of how to go about tasks such as this, it only needs the request. I will probably also do same EFT tapping to establish and strengthen the neural pathways for my empowering belief that I am a powerful creator.
It's such a pleasure that clearing is now so much easier than it used to be. Much gratitude for that. Though we've earned it.
I mark this first half of November as an anniversary of sorts. Last year at this time, a new neighbor invited me to join her in taking a journalling class. It all unfolded as a loving, helping hand, the one I sorely needed, reaching down to assist me in climbing out of a very deep dark hole I was engulfed in.
And this past year has been a year of immense growth, expansion, wonder, and progress on the continuous path of ascension. A year of finding courage, expanding perspectives, welcoming epiphanies, identifying, releasing and replacing limiting beliefs, clearing old energy patterns, and deepening my understanding of myself and how we create through our consciousness. There has been so much to celebrate. My friendship with the new neighbor has become one of dear, trusted allies on the path. One afternoon this past July, she shook her head and said that she could hardly believe I was the same person she'd first met last November.
Yet still, as I strive to shift my circumstances and create the life I want, one that truly reflects who I am now, I come up against one obstacle after another. It's been maddeningly frustrating. I keep bringing myself back to center, tune up my frequency, take action towards what I want to create, trust and believe in our power, my power, to manifest with grace and ease. Applying all that I know as the process of creation. Hitting another obstacle, pressing forward, looking deeper within to uncover what inside is creating the resistance I chafe against.
With the transition through the September Equinox, and full lunar eclipse, we have moved into uncharted territory, one that supports our ever increasing capacities to master the use of our thoughts, emotions, beliefs, and inspirations to create what is good for us and so equally good for all. The obstacles we encounter now are reflections of inner resistance and discord. They always have been, only now we have the capacity to observe and understand this process. And now the process of manifestation unfolds into the material so much faster than before.
I've been watching my hidden inner discord manifest as obstacles. It's at times a stunning demonstration of my ability to create. I can feel the power. But who on Earth wants to excel at creating obstacles for oneself??? Not I. Not you either, I'm sure. I want to create what is good and beautiful and what supports and nurtures the expansion of consciousness within humanity on Earth. The journey has been long and it's now our time for living in joy.
Last night after reading who-you-are-becoming, the latest channelled message from Meredith Murphy, I connected to my Divine Self and asked once again for inner knowing about the limiting beliefs and emotional vibrations within that are getting in my way. The answers came so quickly. First I saw with clarity, a pattern of avoidance I operate in about so many things in my life - creating my new business, creative projects in my home, reaching out to connect with others. The pattern is immense and pervasive. Then came the knowing of where this pattern arose. It's a pattern born, despite putting forth great dedication and perseverance, and obtaining much accomplishment, of experiencing in my career immense anguish, defeat, and despair. The depth of these feelings has been so large, I've cordoned them off and avoided them, as well as anything that even remotely resembled work. It's never been my style to avoid tough issues and feelings. For more than thirty years I've ventured in to feel, sort, learn, and resolve the pain I've experience. Why would I create a pattern of avoidance this time. I sense my fears arise due to the enormity of it all. And feeling defeated.
Inner knowing is always right. And as confirmation, there it is, a big murky pool of anguish, despair and defeat I've buried within because it's felt too large to deal with. As if avoidance ever works. Dealing with the consequences, the unwanted manifestations arising as a result of this unresolved pool of pain, is now totally unacceptable to me.
So today is journalling day. Avoid no more! I'm diving inward with uncompromising courage to explore the depths, sort and release these painful emotions. I'll rewrite my stories about my career experiences, examine the limiting beliefs that create resistance and obstacles, and draft the new empowering beliefs I choose for their replacement. Basically clean out Fibber Magee's closet, as it were. It is my intention to emerge from this process re-newed in spirit, re-freshed in confidence and self-trust. To realize more fully who I am, and in the process come into possession of some new pearls of wisdom for my necklace. You see, one of the added perks of being a Lightworker is that along the often arduous path of ascension, we pick up hidden jewels and pearls of wisdom along the way.
Have you heard this before? I have, many years ago. I believed I understood and absorbed this basic law of how our Consciousness creates. Thus I'd tucked it away in mental file drawers thinking I had incorporated it into the way I live. Ha ha ha. The laugh was on me, so to speak. This is the story of how I unwittingly created a fiasco for myself on a grand scale, and as a result, really learned my power, our power, to create by where we focus our thoughts and emotions. If you read my last post, you probably read between the lines that I've been involved in building a house. The house project is a big part of why I was an absent blogger for so long. I'm not going to give you the whole sequence of events or this will turn into the longest blog post on record. Suffice it to say, all seemed to start off well, but then problems arose, first with the design and plans, then builder incompetence, dishonesty and horrendous fraud. To say this was all very upsetting is an understatement. I spent many months hiring numerous construction experts, a forensic accountant, and legal representation, all at great expense. The fraud was insidious, woven through every line item on the builders monthly statements. It took me hours and hours, and hours first to obtain, and then sift through invoices, time sheets, and the calendar of events, in order to identify and quantify the extent of the fraud. As well as identifying the defects in construction that had to be corrected. I spent six months devoting my time and focused attention to all the problems created by this dishonest builder. Throughout it all I seethed with anger, a very potent and highly charged emotion. I felt disappointment, exasperation, despair, pain, and fear about my future financial stability due to the large economic losses, .
When construction resumed with a new builder, it didn't take very long until more problems arose with construction. Thankfully, I did not experience the same outright fraud, that I'd protected myself from. The problems fell into the category of incompetence - mistakes made and then lying about how easily they could be corrected, then walking away instead of correcting them as they were contractually liable to do.
As a result, I've spent twice as much as was originally budgeted and wiped out my savings for retirement. I've still got significant expenses to redo all the plumbing and come up with some solution to the long, jagged cracks through out the polished concrete floors which can't be repaired, before I can finish putting in the kitchen, bathrooms, etc. I've been living in an unfinished for over a year. Throughout this whole scenario, I asked myself over and over again "What have I been doing to create this?"
Over the past year I reflected on this questions from every perspective I could find. I dove into a deep level of introspection about many parts of myself. I read more books. I re-read the Law of One. I looked for a job. Finally, I began to take a break from all the housing construction issues and do a few things for myself, like take a journalling class and meeting some new people. I worked on releasing all the negative feelings and raising my vibration.
Then one day, after spending a good part of the day researching about filing complaints with various regulatory agencies against the builder and irresponsible subcontractors, I found myself, once again, with thoughts and emotions churning away inside about all the construction problems. It felt awful, especially after I'd been able to move out of that state for a reasonable period. I suddenly stopped myself, thinking "I'm not going to sink back into focusing on all the construction problems and how angry I am about them. I'm going to keep my vibration up." And I went to sleep.
Next morning, in the lushness of theta brain wave state as I was waking, came the answer to how I created this construction fiasco. I created them by focusing my thoughts and attention on problems, while intensely feeling strong, low vibration emotions. In doing so, I just created more and more construction defects. It's interesting that I received the answer only after I took action to stop myself from focusing my attention and feelings on something I knew was counterproductive to me. I got the confirmation after I demonstrated that I'd gotten the lesson.
At the moment of this realization, I understood so clearly just how powerful I am (we are) at creating by where we focus our attention and our emotions. What we focus on expands. Expands in this context means: increases, multiplies, becomes more ingrained in our reality. Now I understand why I received guidance a few years ago Not to keep focusing on all the dastardly deeds of the elitist cabals and violent earth changes. I'm too powerful to focus attention and anger and fear on the dark things that happen.
The lesson from this story can be applied in so many positive ways. Exploring how we can use our ability to create is worth a longer discussion. Maybe let this sink in for a bit, look at how you may have been creating in your own life, and I'll continue this exploration in Part II.
Yesterday I logged into this blog for the first time in a very long time. It's been over four years since I last posted??? How did so much time go by? In honestly, I made two serious attempts at posting over the past few years, only to have blogger delete all but the first two or three sentences of the posts when I clicked publish. After a few choice words, I figured it was what was meant to be. Then more time passed.
One thing really struck me yesterday when I logged on, I noticed in the site's behind the scenes statistics that there had been over 400 page views in the past month, despite no new posts in years. Wow!!
I take this as an invitation. The questions is Where do I begin after being a dormant blogger for so long? Well, this started me thinking about what's transpired in my life, both my outer life and inner life, over the past four years. There's no way I'd bore either you or me with a recapping events. However, in reflecting I'm struck by how incredibly much growth and change has occurred on all fronts. It's really astounding how much and how quickly we are all growing and expanding. So, as a little exercise, I wrote out a list of What Have I Learned? in the past four years. Here goes...
I learned how to:
Hatch baby chicks in an incubator
Design and make tile mosaic trim
Rewire light fixtures
Make my own light fixtures with vintage glass and brass lamp parts
Refinish vintage brass hardware
Make Almond milk
Can brandied cherries
Ferment probiotic kefir and kombucha
Make my own almond flour
Bake Paleo brownies, bread, and cookies using almond flour
Track down devious dogs who escaped through the fence
Repair holes in the fence line
Choose an architect
How Not to choose a builder
How to choose a builder
Put in a greenhouse
Plant an orchar
Make chia pudding
Sell stuff on Ebay
Seal stone tile
Live in an unfinished house
Adapt modern door hardware to use antique door knobs
Source building materials
Muscle test to find which box something is in
Muscle test for Truth
I've learned about:
Antique hardware and Victorian era cast bronze door knobs
How metal casting is done
How metal plating is done and undone
All the parts and skills that go into building a house
Granite, olivene, jade, and field stone
Geothermal heatings systems
Solar energy systems
The importance of Integrity
Letting go of a "the SHTF time is coming" mentality
The effectiveness of Joy in the downfall of the NWO cabals
The features of vinyl vs. wood windows
Multipoint door hardware
Using reclaimed construction materials
The role dolphins and whales play in maintaining the harmonics of Earth
How important it is to use my authority when managing a big project
How expensive fencing is
Maintaining gravel "crush" driveways
Native trees of the Pacific Northwest
Shrinkage cracks in concrete
Outrageous electric bills when they charge the wrong rate per kilowatt
More of the true history of our planet
This Great Shift being a multi-generational process
The dangers of vaccines
The dangers of GMO foods
How much better I feel when I take my vitamins
How to create a website
How valuable much of my food storage has been
What a total waste much of my food storage has been
Being the mother of the bride when your daughter is 8,000 miles away
How wonderful it is to have my sister live nearby
Creating a new circle of like-minded friends
Creating a new consulting and organizational transformation business
Being a bridge-builder to New Earth
How we have already surpassed our expectations for this lifetime
How loved I am in the universe
Restarting a blog
On the path of Spiritual growth I've learned more of the joys and wonder of:
Being self referencing
Releasing and replacing limiting beliefs
Releasing old emotions from my physical body
Being my best cheer leader
The value of re-writing our stories
Expanding my skills at manifesting
Using the quantum field in creating
How what we focus on expands
How powerful I am at expanding what I focus on
What things not to focus on
Being able to raise my vibration at will
Installing a control panel for my frequency, abundance flow, and rebooting
Reprogramming my self-talk
The amazing multidimensional vehicle that is our DNA
Reprogramming my DNA for health and longevity
Shifting to a new paradigm of perception
Becoming a New Human
Defining what I want to experience
The importance of the questions we ask in how we see the world around us
Approaching life as a Creator
Having an expanding array of tools to use in creating
Landing on 4D/5D New Earth and leading the way in uncharted territory
Loving life in embodied form
Well that's my off the top of my head response. I'm sure there are a number of things that will pop in my mind over the next day or two as "Oh, I forgot that I also learned about ________!"
This turned out to be a very enlightening little exercise. There have been so many times over the past few years that I felt I wasn't doing or accomplishing very much. Making this list demonstrates to me that clearly I was wrong. Rather, I'll now say I've travelled quite far. I believe we all have. Farther than we realize. So much farther
You might considering making a list yourself of all that you've learned in the past few years. I'll bet it has just as much diversity and scope. And whether you write out a list or not, be sure to cheer and congratulate yourself for all that you've learned and how much you've grown. I'll be cheering with you!
Please send your prayers of love and gratitude to water at the nuclear plants in Fukushima, Japan!
By the massive earthquakes of Magnitude 9 and surreal massive tsunamis, more than 10,000 people are still missing…even now… It has been 16 days already since the disaster happened. What makes it worse is that water at the reactors of Fukushima Nuclear Plants started to leak, and it’s contaminating the ocean, air and water molecule of surrounding areas.
Human wisdom has not been able to do much to solve the problem, but we are only trying to cool down the anger of radioactive materials in the reactors by discharging water to them.
Is there really nothing else to do?
I think there is. During over twenty year research of hado measuring and water crystal photographic technology, I have been witnessing that water can turn positive when it receives pure vibration of human prayer no matter how far away it is. Energy formula of Albert Einstein, E=MC2 really means that Energy = number of people and the square of people’s consciousness.
Now is the time to understand the true meaning. Let us all join the prayer ceremony as fellow citizens of the planet earth. I would like to ask all people, not just in Japan, but all around the world to please help us to find a way out the crisis of this planet!! The prayer procedure is as follows.
Name of ceremony: “Let’s send our thoughts of love and gratitude to all water in the nuclear plants in Fukushima”
Day and Time: March 31st, 2011 (Thursday) 12:00 noon in each time zone
Please say the following phrase: “The water of Fukushima Nuclear Plant, we are sorry to make you suffer.
Please forgive us. We thank you, and we love you.”
Please say it aloud or in your mind. Repeat it three times as you put your hands together in a prayer position. Please offer your sincere prayer.
Thank you very much from my heart.
With love and gratitude, Masaru Emoto Messenger of Water"
This is so beautiful I wanted to share it. I don't know the name of the song or songwriter. A friend translated the lyrics (Post note - See my comment following for correction and attribution):
"I am my voice that I haven't known, I am the truth inside the chaos, I am the rights of the people suffering in tyranny, I am freedom fighters that aren't afraid, I am the secrets that didn't die, I am free, my words are free!" ... Singer is Amel Mathlouthi
I start with where I am, move outward, then back to center. Lessons appear at every level.
Last week I flew from Washington to Washington, then back again. I'd almost canceled the trip because it seemed pointless. Communication with some siblings was so fractured and unresponsive. I've been conversing with my mother via thought messages delivered through higher levels, a very effective method as her physical status declines.
Since Christmas, a month ago, I processed through all the feelings raised in the course of conversations and emails with my siblings. And I let go. I let go of trying to influence the situation. I let go of hopes of that the communication patterns would change. I let go of wanting to maintain relationships with a couple of them. I let go of wishing they would recognize the value of my professional experience in law and health care and terminal illness. I let go of hopes that finances would be managed to avoid great losses to my mother's estate in this volatile economic state. I let go of hoping they would wake up. After letting go of all this, there didn't seem much point to my making the trip back to my mother's home, but I went anyway. Ticket paid for and all.
What wonderful gifts I received in response to all my letting go.
My brother picked me up at the airport, even though my connecting flight had been delayed in Kansas City and my plane didn't arrive until ten minutes of midnight. He was sitting on a bench just outside the security gate, waiting for me. Smiling. He said he'd figured I'd be hungry when I arrived and had gotten some treats to share. This never happened before. We chatted until 2:30 AM about political and world events. "I'm so glad to talk with you about all this, I've been feeling so alone with no one to talk to who would understand." Music to my ears, as they say. My brother has woken up. My sister arrived the next day. She is now wide awake too. Only two still hanging out in sleep. Then in the moments before leaving for my return flight, one dozing sister echoed my alert that we needed to shift investments out of municipal bonds before the cascade of state bankruptcies begins. Wow, what I wanted is appearing!
Sometimes I almost forget the key to manifesting...put out clearly what you want, then let go completely of the outcome. Leave wiggle room in your perspective as to what may appear. So very important to leave wiggle room so that miracles have space to emerge, when they're so inclined. Notice what changes, even if small or subtle.
Or not so subtle. Look! People are waking up all over!
Out in the whole wide world the courageous Tunisians have modeled the effectiveness of standing up. One dictator out, cabinet cohorts out. What it took was one 26 year old vegetable vendor, Mohamed Bouazizi, repeatedly harassed and humiliated by police and denied the permit to sell vegetables, setting himself a fire and igniting an overthrow. Now Egypt. I've been glued to the computer all day watching the news. This is the best first person account I've read. More than one source reports today that some Egyptian military are standing with protesters, rather than with the police. Word out is that the people of Jordan and Yemen are following right along. Global revving up. We're watching The Powers That Were's biggest fear emerge into reality, the people are waking up, standing up, and claiming their Free Will.
The US government isn't sure how to respond. How could they, without revealing their true agenda? Our tax dollars paid for the armored vehicles being used against the peacefully protesting Egyptians. Everything is interconnected. The elite have done a very good job marketing freedom and democracy throughout the world, and people have listened. As their hypocrisy continues to be unmasked, they'll have to reap what they sowed; people demanding freedom. The irony is not to be missed.
I'm sitting here at my kitchen counter, in the land of the freedom and democracy, wondering as I type whether anything I've written here could be misconstrued as inciteful. Or if following friends' posts on Facebook could draw unwanted attention? Getting first hand accounts and photos from Tunisia and Egypt as their revolutions unfold is a good thing, isn't it?
I've put out what I want: a quick, non-violent transformation of the planet into what it was meant to be, a place where we all, each and everyone, live in peace, joy, and harmony with one another and with the natural world. I've let go of the outcome. Because I really don't know what's going to happen. My perspective leaves plenty of wiggle room for possibility. Even if small, I notice the changes for the better. The act of observing changes the outcome.
We are four weeks into the year of more change than we can comprehend.
The immense changes taking place as we progress through this Great Transition play out in our individual personal lives. Last Saturday I read Les Visible's post, What if We all Just tried a Little Harder? in which he asks readers to do what they can on a daily basis to alleviate suffering in the world around them. I appreciate this request that reminds us that we can make a difference in people's lives. It came at a perfect time for me.
The day before his post, I'd discovered a rather vindictive act my brother had taken against me. The overall effect of my brother's action is not of much concern to me, however that he acted at all under the circumstances and the deceptive process he chose were very unsettling. Since he was a very small child, age two or three, my brother has been angry and defensive, and he's never liked me for reasons I've never discerned. Despite this, I've treated him with kindness and understanding, and helped at times when he needed help. Reading Les' blog post when I was still somewhat stunned, really highlighted the contrast between those who seek to alleviate suffering in the world around them and those who seek to inflict it.
It's always interesting to observe the timing of when things happen. The circumstance of my mother's declining health brings me back into some level of purposeful interactions with my siblings, as compared to sporadic casual conversation, right at the cusp of a huge expansion of consciousness. I ask why am I being brought into a position of participating in decisions and plans with family members whose perception of reality differs so vastly from mine. We view everything as if we're on different channels. Their channel no longer matches my perception of reality and they don't even recognize that my channel exists. Being involved with my family of origin gives me the opportunity to confirm that I've worked through, cleared and released most of the old issues, and raises a few remnants for examination and release. That's for all of us in the next few weeks, the last phase of clearing out the Old.
Today I realize that in the past few weeks' family dealings I've made the big step to truly owning and being comfortable with the fact that I have no control. I can put out suggestions and share my observations, but I have absolutely no control over the outcome. And most importantly, that is OK, even when the outcome I foresee based on their choices is not such a good one. It is what it is. They each have the free will to make their choices. There is nothing they do or say that changes who I am. It's a good thing to measure where I am now in relation to where I came from.
I'm keenly aware that the pace of everything continues to speed up. Around the planet, the dark forces quicken the pace of implementing their atrocious plans, as if they know that their time is soon coming to an end. Which it is. Earth too has quickened her pace of releasing the old energies of fear, hatred, violence and blood spilled upon the land. Snow storms, rains and floods washing away the old. Volcanoes and quakes releasing the energies that Earth absorbed on human's behalf, energies which have never served her. Our loving Earth. The magnetic poles are shifting and the magnetosphere growing more unstable in preparation for reversal of the poles. Earth needs to flip things around. In some instances, a literal change needs to happen in order effect the figurative change.
The New will really begin streaming in at the March Equinox, with another exponential increase of energy and pace. The Old systems that sway erratically from instability will start visibly collapsing, making way for the New. We're going to have a wild ride crossing dimensional boarders from the third to the forth dimension. I find myself growing more and more excited as I consider what's just ahead. Not that I know what's going to happen, I don't. Yet some part of me appears to remember at the cellular level making such a dimensional transition before. It's an honor to be here incarnate on Earth and join with her in Ascension to the forth dimension.
I look out at the transition occurring on a planetary level and see it's reflection occurring in my family of origin. The Mothers preparing for their imminent transition to another dimension. The children each responding from the level of understanding and growth they've attained. Releasing what was known and familiar. Letting go. As Above, so Below.
In the early hours I woke with a jolt, second guessing whether any sentence in yesterday's post could be misconstrued as a call to revolt. Not a good feeling. It's readily apparent to all who know me that I abhor violence in any form, other than necessary self-defense, so only advocate non-violence as a means to reform. At the same time injustice sets off reverberations coursing through my soul and drives me to speak out, as it should. If there ever was one, this is a time to act with great care and forethought.
I've written on more than one occasion that one of the major lessons presented in this time is for people, individually and collectively, to own and assert their Free Will. Free Will to chose for yourself is the birth-right of each incarnate on this planet. It's so important that we acknowledge our right to choose and make our choices consciously.
Each of us came into this lifetime here on Earth to take part in this Great Shift. Prior to coming in, we each made agreements as to the roles we would play in assisting humanity through this enormous and complex process of transformation. To add extra interest to this grand experiment, we came in with the veil of forgetfulness covering our memories of who we are and why we came. Fortunately from the higher level of wholeness we've been guided by synchronicity and coincidence along our chosen path, with gentile nudges and running head-long into brick walls when we stray.
One of my chosen purposes, as I'm still discovering over time, is to inspire, uplift, assist others in understanding their magnificence. This sounds grand, and it is a very honorable role. Yet in practice there are many ways of assisting, some of which, like unintentionally pushing people's buttons thereby raising their unresolved issues for them to sort through or not as they choose, aren't so pleasant an experience on my part. Having people go off at me when my conscious intent towards them is kindness and understanding is not so enjoyable. It helped when I finally understood that assisting comes in many forms and not to take everything, really anything, personally.
In the big transition plan there are those who came in to help bring down the systems, those who came to give their life for the cause, those who will offer sustenance and compassion to the injured in the fray, and those who came to create the new. Some came to be in the public eye and others to work quietly among the masses. Early on, before I really understood anything about this Great Shift, I received very clear guidance that I was not to be involved in bringing down the systems. OK, good, I like to create new things that serve the interests of All. However, I detest injustice and inflicted suffering. And I'm the daughter of an activist, so there may be a genetic and socialization component as well. It's sometimes difficult for me to keep my mouth shut and stand by patiently until we reach the rebuilding stage. Really screws up the play if the actors are so gung-ho to get on stage that enter before their cue. And doing so could threaten my ability to fulfill my chosen mission. If I allow myself to get caught up in the bringing down phase, I might not be here for the creating anew phase. (this is not to ignore that from more than one perspective creating anew has already begun.) Hence, I want to choose my words carefully and not draw attention from certain factions of society who do not appreciate the value of human freedom.
Another of my roles is to witness. I'm not at liberty to share much at this time about those who came to witness, so please excuse the cryptic nature of what I share here. Awareness is just beginning in the larger community. I see it in the increased use of a specific word in the writings and descriptions out in the world. Though the word is not yet spoken or written in full conscious awareness of it's meaning, other than by a small handful of people. Suffice it to say that the broader conscious awareness must wait until after the dark forces are vanquished. This is true for other things as well. There is much that will be revealed when it is safe to do so.
What's important for each of now is to get really clear about what our roles are. The curtain's gone up and many of the actors are already on stage. If you're supposed to be on stage now, and you're not, get out there. If your entrance cue is coming up, be ready in the wings. If you're not on till act II or III, wait backstage, prepare yourself, help others prepare, and offer encouragement to everyone about to make their entrance. Don't crowd the wings because you'll be blocking the way for those who need to make their entrances or exits and make it difficult for the stage crew to handle light cues and scene changes. It can also distract the audience to glimpse people waiting in the wings, and believe me, the audience needs to learn everything they can from this show. Most of all, remember, you came here to Earth fully prepared. You will be magnificent!
I have a small engraved sign that used to sit on my desk when I was practicing law that says, "What would you do if you knew you could not fail."
I've grown weary of reading any more articles describing the elitists and their plans and past activities to destroy economies and people. I already know this and find no additional benefit from reading another take on the subject. While I do look out for new information, like mobile prison watch towers popping up in Walmart parking lots, the bird and fish kills occurring this week, and the precipitous decline in the bee populations, I see no point in rehashing what we've already known for some time.
The rehashing is in many ways self-defeating. By restating and restating in all assorted flavors of analogies, it only serves to confirm their presence, making it all the more manifest, and increasing their power, especially if people let fear get invoked. This is not to exclude the value of educating those who are newly awakened, but isn't there enough descriptive info out there already?
I also don't mean to diminish the importance of previously hidden secret activities coming into the light of scrutiny. Exposure is hugely important. Darkness ceases to exist when exposed to Light. We saw an illustration of this in the broadly distributed information about their plan to nuke Iran, the predicted "Israeli Mistake." By exposing their plan ahead of time, it caused a retreat and hasty switch to plan B. (This article by Clif High is worth a read. He gives us a concrete example of our ability to alter reality through our attention and emotions) Let the new information come out into the Light. We also need it to keep up with the current state of what is around us, know what we're dealing with, and thwart the plans through our focused attention.
What I keep watching for and don't see enough of are the new ideas of what we can do to usher in positive change. I'm ready for the next phase. I want the implosion to come already. (This link is one of the best explanations about the financial crisis to come. Excuse the sales pitch at the end though) Tonight I'm tired of waiting. Isn't it time to start picking up the debris yet? Isn't it time to really start creating the new reality we dream of in our heart where every person is respected and appreciated, where the natural world is cherished and learned from, where we create with cognizance of our connection to All? Imminent can be interminable every once in a moment. Sometimes impatience gets the better of me, and when it does, it's best to refocus and put our energies back on preparations. I remind myself that my every act of kindness towards another person or animal, my every act of stewardship of the earth is an act of rebuilding.
Last night I went to volunteer orientation at the Red Cross. Wow, I learned a few things I didn't know like the Red Cross receives zero government funding. It allows them to keep their mission and fundamental principles intact: Humanity, Impartiality, Neutrality, Independence, Voluntary Service, Unity, and Universality. I'm liking the Red Cross more than I thought I would. In the next few weeks I'll start training for managing logistics on the Disaster Action Team. A bit daunting when the volunteer coordinator shared that in a disaster, the ceiling tiles in the classroom are removed, wires for phones and computers drop down, the room turns into the logistics management headquarters, and the pace is intense. I also learned that a former astronaut also serves on the logistics team and that she's a very dynamic woman who's gone to space three times. From time to time people have called me a space cadet, perhaps we'll get along well. But seriously, I would love to talk with someone who's traveled in space about their experiences. Very cool, unexpected prospect.
Silver prices dropped the past two days and I've added a little more to my small cache. The premium charged by the coin dealer for "junk" silver (1964 and earlier) is much smaller than for new silver Eagles, 62 cents vs. $3. The coins are more interesting too. This augmentation contained a couple of half dollars from the 1940's, some Ben Franklins, and a few John F. Kennedy's. A woman in the shop was inquiring about whether or not it was a good idea to trade in the sterling silver flatware. Easier to trade with silver coins and bullion than with forks and spoons she was advised. Might not be a bad idea to cruise through the antique markets searching out bargains on silver flatware. My guess is that in tight economic times there are people unloading the old, unused family silver to make some cash.
I've familiarized myself with the grocery and health food stores in town and joined the local coop. After years of being warned to store food, we're seeing the first glimpses in the news of how threatened our food supply is. These two facts were confirmed at the training last night. In a disaster, gasoline is all sold out in one day, food in the stores within two to three days. Again, I'm adding to my food storage. The coop gives a fifteen percent discount for bulk purchases.
Tomorrow morning, I'll review what I have in the way of gardening equipment because some things, like hoses, wheel barrow, large ceramic pots, and most of my tomato supports, never made it onto the moving truck. That tender blue kale I've discovered here turns out to be Italian kale. Ordering more seeds is a priority. Last year it was difficult to get some seeds, like heirloom onions, they were always sold out. My advice, get your seed orders in now, if you haven't already done so. With that horrendous food legislation now law, we have to move quickly. Over the past two years I've built up a good store of heirloom vegetable seeds, still I believe that adding more will not be too much. Others will need them, or the food they produce.
We do the best that we can do. It's 11:11 right now.
This morning, the last day of 2010, I sat in reflection. recognizing the vast journey traveled over the past year. All the small steps, the days that felt stagnant, the hectic times when there was little time to think, they all add up to great growth. As I look forward into 2011, I envision what I want to create for myself and create within the larger world. I intend my every action, big and small, to open doors into our New Earth where Darkness has no place.
For the past eight years I've spent New Year's Eve alone, preferably with a warm fire in the hearth. Part of my New Year's Eve ritual is to draw one Animal Medicine card for the year ahead and to journal on the message contained in the card. I have a special journal just for my New Year's ritual. (Hope I can find it in one of the unpacked boxes by this evening) I tend to draw either the Eagle or the Hawk, which has been a wonderful talisman. Soaring, vision, higher perspective, touching the heights.
The other day my dear friend, Julia, called and said she'd just received a new deck of Angel cards and wanted to draw four of them for me. (Doreen Virtue's Messages From Your Angels cards) My heart responded with sudden warmth towards these cards. I decided to ask for guidance in relating with my siblings through this period of my mother's transition to Light. Julia passed her hand slowly over the spread out deck and pulled a card each time I said Stop. Then she read each card to me. Yesterday we repeated this process as I asked for guidance for this coming year, five Angels came forward. One Angel appeared both times and the collective messages I received in these sessions all come together around a beautiful central theme.
I want to share this with you because I believe these Angels offer loving guidance for each one of us as we move through 2011.Here are the Angels' messages.....
You are a Lightworker and God needs you to Shine. Your life's mission is expanding and your presence is needed. It's important to clear yourself often so that your field remains clear and open, especially after helping others.
Visualize what you want and it will come. Negativity will block you so release all negative emotions and thoughts. Make the decisions of what you want and know the Angels are always present to assist you.
If you find yourself confused or indecisive, it is because you do not have enough information to make an informed decision. Ask your Guides and Angels to give you the information you require in your dreams, through your body, and your imagination. The information will be provided to you.
You deserve Heaven's help. The Angels are waiting to assist you. Ask for what you want.
When you take excellent care of yourself, everyone benefits. Take time for relaxation, true relaxation in which you allow yourself to fill with peace and calmness. You open yourself Spiritually through relaxing.
Take action. You're in touch with your Truth in this lifetime. Trust your gut and lovingly assert yourself.
It is safe for you to be powerful, without fear that you might abuse your power. You are a loving being. Know that you are capable of using your power in loving ways.
You deserve the best so reach for the stars with your dreams and desires. Do Not compromise! Happiness is an integral part of your purpose.
Later last evening, I turned with my inner eye and looked around me. There were all the Angels encircling me. And here they stay. Every part of my being knows and trusts that they will travel with me through this new year, always present, always waiting to assist as I need, always available for guidance, comfort and protection. My own cosmic security force!
Your Angels are there for you too, so call them in to gather around you. The path unfolds before us, an unknown, full of love, challenges, joy, and possibility. Take a moment to breathe and center, a moment to know and trust that you'll be traveling forward through the new year with your entourage of Angels.
I need to be journaling. It's my method for sorting out feelings and working through issues that arise. I used to write a couple of pages daily. Then it waned down to a couple of lines, and every couple of days, until I haven't written in a couple of months. Other than here in this blog.
Now I'm yearning to pick up a pen and just write. Universe gives us such wonderful opportunities to sort through the emotional junk we gather in the course of experiencing life. Over the past few years we've all encountered situation after situation in which we could examine our trigger points, resolve the inner conflicts, and release them. Over the past year, I've felt so clear and free within. Yet once again, I'm getting one of those wonderful opportunities for personal growth. At the moment, I'm seriously leaning towards ranting and raving.
My mother's recent stoke has left her unable to manage her own affairs. Her medical expenses are significant with full time nursing care. As a result of her condition, I'm having to coordinate with my siblings, four sisters and a brother, in handling all the financial issues for our mother. Originally, my mother named me to act for her under her durable power of attorney. When I moved away from DC, she added my brother and youngest sister who live in the area. A few months ago, my oldest sister went to my mother's attorney and had her name added, so now there are four of us charged with this responsibility. Is it a coincidence that the sisters and brother on the power of attorney are the ones I feel most friction with???? The short answer is, of course, No. To make matters worse, we were not each given copies of the durable power of attorney nor my mother's revocable living trust. On short notice we're trying to assume responsibility and don't have the documents that tell us what authority we've been granted. So typical.
Nothing like being thrown back into all the old family dynamics and communication patterns, most of them dysfunctional. With six adult children in the family (the seventh, my oldest sister, died in 1998), it gets quite complex.
So that I'm not just talking in the abstract, here are some of the long standing patterns I'm dealing with:
Independence is of the highest value. The importance of our relationships as siblings has never been acknowledged in any form. As one sister I'm close to said yesterday, "We were never encouraged to be nice to each other, and never had any limits or intervention imposed on how mean we were to each other."
In family communications about important news, activities, or decisions, one or two family members are always left out of the loop on a random alternating basis. This includes major events like birth of a child, graduations, why a family member can't attend your wedding, serious illnesses, etc.
Family members are never acknowledged or consulted for the expertise and mastery they've acquired. This is true even though everyone is highly competent and highly educated.
Criticism and judgment are thrown about freely, often behind someone's back and with little to no knowledge of real facts about whatever situation they're complaining about. I've called it The Family Gossip Network.
Basically, I hate the way I'm treated within my family, and I hate the way they treat each other. At the same time, I love each of them for who they are. And now I'll need to work with them in the coming months on a regular basis.
What I've done so far is to raise one of the issues, always leaving one or two out of the loop, in a group email I sent today. This was necessitated after I learned that the other three on the power of attorney made some significant financial decisions and didn't think/remember to include me in the discussion and decision-making. And only three days after a conference call for the purpose of agreeing to work together and include everyone in all the communications. Anyway, I'm curious about what the response will be to my email.
So far, I've confirmed the wisdom of my choices to move first one hour away from the family home (and become very busy with my work), then eight hours away, and now across the continent. My choice now, considering I'll have to be actively involved with my family, is to voice that this period, during and after Mom transitions to the other side, is an opportunity for us to consciously change the dynamics and communication patterns that are hurtful and do not serve us as individuals or as a family. After my mother passes, all that will hold us together as a family will be our own efforts to stay connected.
I try to see everything as an opportunity for growth. This family situation is really the opportunity for me to learn that I can use my power effectively for all concerned. To use my power without fearing I'll abuse it, and to trust I can be powerful in my usual loving ways. Most of my life I felt very powerless. This has changed significantly, yet I generally shy away from using my power and back off from family situations that hold potential for conflict. Not such a good thing. Yet if I can use my power and natural authority lovingly with my own family, I can do it anywhere. Much gratitude to the Universe for this opportunity. Oh, how tall I will be after growing through this family drama.
This past week when I stopped in the grocery store to pick up just one item, the weekly sales signs started drawing my attention. Before I knew it, I had a cart full of non-perishables. I take this as an intuitive sign it's time to review my food storage, replenish where needed, and augment as possible.
Speaking to the local coin dealer the other day, he indicated that lots of people are converting their dollars into silver. He said he could hardly keep up as people bought both liberty dollars and junk silver as fast as he could get it in. It's reassuring to know that an abundance of awakened souls reside in my near vicinity, even if I haven't gotten to know anyone well enough yet to talk about financial savings strategies.
As I'm writing I'm reminded of a Native American saying I came across many years ago. Though I've searched, I've never found it again, so this is as my memory recorded it:
First grind corn for yourself. Then grind corn for your children and family. Then grind corn for your uncles, aunts, and cousins. And then grind corn for anyone who needs corn.
Wise words. Take care of yourself first, only then are you able to provide well for others.
James Gilliland has been posting video messages with greater frequency lately. I like him. He's right on target in regards to Truth, IMHO. Here's his video posted two days ago. Watching it gave me confirmation that my sense of timing is tuned. He shares in the video that around March 2011 the shift in consciousness will arrive at a turning point where people will start standing up. I've been sensing we have about three months of build up before people all over the globe coordinate their demand that the destructive governments, banksters and corporations end, to be replaced by systems that respect and protect all humans, animals and the planet. It's starting but not yet coordinated and organized. The corrupt, self-serving ways are no longer supported energetically here on the planet and they're dying out, though it's not looking like they'll acquiesce to a graceful death. Evolution expressed as revolution is more likely.
I'll hold out hope that some of the more underground efforts to force the Illuminati out of power will be successful. Yet most of the so-far accurate predictions I've read over the years, Phoenix Rising, Sirians, Pleadians, etc. predict a revolution of violence beyond what we can imagine. Web bots shared the same. Our collective actions always influence the outcomes, so I'll continue to hold out hope that extreme violence can be avoided.
However, preparation is advisable. I've not been through a revolution in this lifetime, nor lived in a country at war on it's own soil, though I certainly have genetic memory of having done so in past life times. Gathering together the facts and experiences I've read over the years in news articles, personal accounts, and historical fiction, there are generalizations we can make as to what will help in weathering through this part of the transition. Store food, take good care of yourself, avoid the big cities, and know your neighbors because they're your immediate support network.
There are two other steps I'm taking, volunteering with the local Red Cross on the team trained to manage logistics in an emergency, and obtaining a job with a local social service agency. There's an opening for a case manager working with the homeless. Very low pay, but if I'm hired, it will get me connected with the service network in this area, give me a front line view of what's happening, and allow me to assist others in these times. Being new in town, these are also among the best ways for me to meet good people in town.
The most important preparation of all for me is continuing my evolution. This is our opportunity to fully be Spirit, in action, in human form. I think back on how I felt when I first started preparing for what might come. At the time I might have said I didn't feel much fear, I sure hoped then that I wasn't fearful. Yet by comparison with how I feel now, I can see that I've really released a lot of fear about what's ahead. At present I feel like I'm on call, waiting and knowing my pager will soon go off. Calm, yet ready to spring into action when needed.
As James Gilliland reminds us, connect with your heart and go out in nature. We acquire so much wisdom and inner balance walking through the trees, listening to the ocean, gazing at the stillness of the night sky, smelling the earth. Connecting through your heart is our doorway. It's the doorway to your power, to the wisdom and peace of the higher consciousness. Our hearts are the doorways of connecting with each other where we are All One.