Sunday, October 3, 2010

Out of the Holding Pattern and Becoming Who We Really Are

Not quite sure how I went over a months without writing, either here or in my journal, but I apparently have.

I look back over the past six month or so and see that I, probably many of us, have been kept in the holding pattern. Seems it would never end, even though we know it will eventually and that remaining in a relatively removed space serves the greater purpose. Not much of anything I tried to initiate in the last six months got off the ground. Work I tried to start up never went anywhere. It appeared that I'd finally found a group of like minded people in my small town, only to discover as I got to know them that they were not operating on the same level, and worse, they recognized my energy and wanted to use it towards their well intentioned, yet misguided agenda. I cut that off right quick. When things aren't clicking, I step back and observe the patterns of what's going on. Doing so helps us gain clarity and understanding of the bigger picture. There's been much cleansing taking place on all levels. In a way, we've been set aside for a bit in order that deeper cleansing could occur. Bit tedious from our individual perspective, but immensely needed at the larger perspective.

Then the Fall Equinox arrived, always a great transition point, and now everything is beginning to move forward again. I will be too. Initially I imagined myself staying in this location for some time. The land and climate suit me. The property I live on has wonderful energy, beauty, and a peacefulness I relish. I rented it last year and have intended to buy it, which the owners wanted. However as I've ventured out into the community I find almost nothing that resonates with me. Living here has become so boring and way too isolated. Even my dogs are suffering for it despite three acres of fenced land upon which they have free run. Since the Equinox the pull within me to relocate grows daily. My energy has started to surge, which is always a message that I'm focused in the right direction. Not a small move this time, a big one back to where I was born on the opposite coast (but not California).

I checked where my planetary energy lines run on (open an account, click "Free Horoscopes" at the top menu, not the side bar, and select "Astro Click Travel") The location I'm drawn to marks the convergence of my Sun, Mercury, my Descendant, and Lower Mid-heaven. Very nice combination. I've scheduled an astrological reading with George Ward, who is skilled in reading the interplay of various planets and identifying beneficial locations. A couple of my close relatives are contemplating a move to the same location, so I thought it might be useful for us all to get some insight into the potential of our combined energies there. I've already received guidance that my strongest energy lies on the west coast, rather than the east. After most of my life spent in areas that don't fully support me, it will feel good to reside where my creativity and personal power run the highest.

Really it's the pull of the heart that's leading me in this direction. Intuition that this is a good placement for the unfolding of my mission, whatever that turns out to be. I've received hints, even though I don't fully know the details. I trust it will unfold and trust that I'm well prepared. It's taken steady work to run out my doubts, and well worth the effort because living from a place of trust in the Divine Order feels so much better. Not that I've reached the point of residing in that place of trust 24/7, but I'm making progress. I know the feeling and can tell when I'm centered in my trust.

Everything is changing very rapidly. From my little window on the world it appears that more people are waking up. Wishing that many more would do so right this moment, yet momentum is growing. And it needs to because the new assaults against the people of the planet and the planet herself by the secret corp/govt increase almost daily. Someone posted a fabulous comment on Facebook a few weeks ago that I plan to remember..."We're waking up faster than they can spin their lies!" Gotta love it! :) Wish I'd friended the person who penned the comment. I'd give them attribution.

In between all the MSM's F.E.A.R (False Evidence Appearing as Real) mongering, I'm seeing all kinds of amazing new, creative ideas and initiatives emerging. Fills my heart with joy! It's a topic of it's own so I'll just mention it briefly now and write in depth later this week. May take a few posts. There's a lot.

The other area that's suddenly started moving forward since the Fall Equinox is work related. There's a business idea I have and the timing now appears just right. Though I didn't realize it at first, this idea first came to me a little over a year ago. Then faded. Earlier this spring I had the idea again, set it aside until I had some resources to start it up, and now it's time to start. There is a need in all the communities that are struggling to create something new for their sustainability. And that's where my business comes in. I'm being cryptic, I know, but I'll wait to share the details after I have a little more in place.

Last week I got the message I was right on track. I'd been pondering a name for the business, then one night one name in particular stepped forward in my mind. I searched online and found nothing with this name. Kind of surprising but it must be meant for me. Websites were available, so I've retained them, both .com and .org. The name was available on blogspot so I took it. Same with a gmail address. It almost felt too easy. Boy does it feel good to have everything flowing once again. Most of all, a sense of passion has returned after a very long hiatus. I've never gone for long without passion for my work, until the last four years when it was nowhere to be found. I'm deeply grateful to feel my sense of passion once again. So grateful.

Shifting back into high gear, I'm ready to move full speed ahead. Lots and lots to do in the next month. I'm using this opportunity to release many of my personal possessions. They've served their purpose and now is a very good time for me to release everything that holds old energy so that new energy has space to move in around me in my new home (which I also need to locate). Our possessions hold energies they've acquired during their tenure with us. I'm a very different person now than when most of these things came into my life and I want what surrounds me in my new home to reflect who I am now. Sometimes we have to deal with a fair number of logistics as we move forward in becoming who we really are.

Anyway, I'm welcoming myself back.